standing at the car i watch 4 men

they laugh outside a restaurant

i've gotten to know each of them

they know me, they love me

but i stand back, observing them

i am a stranger by default

i repeatedly sacrifice familiarity 

they have no context for this

if they knew what i knew

would they stand alone too?

or maybe they prefer ignorance

knowing all the same of our paths

soon splitting off in separate ways

but they choose togetherness

and put off the consequences

i always try to live a step ahead

getting in front of the next thing

but when i stop in my tracks

the grief all comes rushing back

can’t outrun your own sabotage

they see me standing far away

laughter pours into the night sky

they know where i'm headed

nights like this are a reminder

they know me well

~ tytoos ~

some fine tuning #10